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The Block Chainletter

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Dear software vendor
Dear innovator
Dear payments guru
Dear marketer

BEWARE!

Now that you have started to read this block chainletter you MUST continue to read it, follow the procedure strictly or great harm will come upon you, your company and your family.

This all started back in 2008 when in an obscure garage Satoshi Nakamoto discovered a wooden box containing a stack of research papers and decided to write his own paper. He called it "Bitcoin: A Peer-to-Peer Electronic Cash System". Little did he know that at the moment of his endeavor, Venus, Mars, the Moon and the Earth were positioned in a constellation that brought a Curse onto his paper, everyone who read it, and everyone who's ever heard the word 
'blockchain'.

The Curse can only be undone by following the below instructions.

  • Get accustomed to the blockchain lingo. Use the words miners, smart contracts, chain permissioning and homomorphic crypto-algorithms as if they were the names of your children
  • As soon as possible, and in any case before you know what the above words actually mean, publish a blog post describing your opinion on blockchain. Keep it vague, but use strong words. Alternatives such as press releases or product announcements are acceptable as well. When someone attacks your opinion, use more difficult words.
  • Copy no less than 10 disruptive blockchain use cases from the internet and claim that you're working on them disruptively. Suggest you're working on the next-generation disruptive blockchain. Make a prediction that your disruptive approach will disrupt any dinosaur company that doesn't use the word disruptive a lot.

Continue on the above path. The Curse upon you, your job and your family will only be lifted when every living soul on this planet, poor or rich, generation x, y, z, millennial, hipster, angel or post-millennial, from whichever background or nation, will have voiced an opinion about blockchain.

Now, forward this block chainletter to your entire contacts database and get on with that blog entry.

Stay safe!

The disruptive views expressed on this blog are my own and do not necessarily reflect the views of Oracle.

 

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